• Author
    Posts
  • #230274

    I am here hoping i can get some advice on a situation that i have here. My mom is currently living with me along with my own little family:my 3 kids and husband. I am going back to work because i need to help my husband with income to be able to make it in this world. Kids are starting school soon, but still will have my 2 year old here at home. I have asked my mother if she could help me out by watching him, while I work. She told me yes without hessitation, but later I find out that she mentioned to my sister if I am going to paying her.

    This bothered me, and can stop thinking about it. After you have no place to live my husband offers you to come live here without any kind of finacial help (because she has no income due to always being ill). Why should i pay you(her)? I give ypu a roof over your head, a room, food,electricity,warm water to shower, tv, all ove the above for no fee. Why? Because your my mother. But yet you ask me to pay you to watch my child so I can go to work to be able to help my husband give you all those things plus raise my family…..im dumbfounded

    ADVICE PLEASE!😩😩

  • #230280

    find a real babysitter. that way when they bitch and complain, you can fire them,and get a new one………..

  • #230288

    😩😩😩 Have a sitter come watch my kid while granny sits and watches tv all day living for free. Hate this situation….

    And i thinking right about all this?

  • #230325

    ABSOLUTELY NOT!

    Now I just don’t understand how grandmothers expect to be paid to watch their grandkids maybe if you lived with her rent free then I would understand her wanting money but she lives with you rent free and should by no means expect to get paid.

    Talk to her and let her know she will not get paid.

  • #230448

    Yes, you pay her. (I assume she is a great babysitter and one you would choose even if she wasn’t related – right? Her illness still allows her to have plenty of energy to give the kids the care you all deserve – right?) . You don’t have to pay her much, but a little money shows her respect and gives her autonomy (maybe she’ll buy the kids a treat, hopefully not buy herself cigarettes). You need to sit down and have a clear conversation as to what her duties are, what YOUR expoectations are (will she be tidying the house or cooking?), and find our what HER expectations are. Put it on a list. Ask her (!) what she thinks she should be paid (and why). Also, stay calm (!!) – your kids need this to work out for the best.

  • #230449

    I would sit down and have a conversation with her, and let her know how you are feeling. If she feels like she should be paid let her explain her reasoning behind it. Also let her know your reasons why or why not you want to pay her.

  • #230758

    You and your husband need to sit down and discuss it…then you need to sit down and discuss it with your mother. She is providing a service that she deserves to be paid for, but you are also providing home,food,etc for her. Maybe she should start chipping in on household expenses. Bottom line is that you did something selfless and loving by inviting your mother to stay with you, but you can’t always expect selfless and loving in return.

  • #233211

    MD.

    Well I would not pay my mother to watch my kids. I mean you all ready do so much for her, the least she can do is help you with your kid. Also if she continue that she wants to get played then you can ask her to pay you rent. I know sounds a little too much but also from her asking you to pay her for watching her grandkid is to much!

  • #233228

    It would be fair for her to pay part of the bills first!

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.